Lyrics tweets again:
And tweet tweets too:
I think I just still enjoy wordles, and this is the corpus I have to hand.
Also, too many of my tweets are moans, and from this I can tell that they’re often moans about London, the office, the weekend not arriving soon enough etc. I’d suspected as much, but here’s graphic confirmation. I will stare at this image next time I think of tweeting the same moan twice.
If (i) trainspotters are discouraged from trainspotting, and (ii) police are being reminded of their longstanding obligation to wear identification numbers, perhaps trainspotters could turn to taking down police numbers instead?
I imagine a collaborative website might work here, e.g. “SO 543 was very kind in showing me the way to the station”, “Think SO 258 might be racist”, “SO 330 just attacked my newspaper-vending friend in cold blood” etc.
Obvious problems: police will game the system, police will break their own bloody rules anyway. Needs more thought…
Bob Dylan Willis, grumpiest man alive, offers his predictions for the County Championship 2009, second division:
Derbyshire: Look a little light as a lot of experienced players have gone since the end of last season. … the bowling attack is not good and I predict they will once again finish in the bottom half.
Essex: The loss of Graham Napier to the IPL is a blow but they should have him for the rest of the summer.
Glamorgan: Matthew Maynard has got to do something down in Wales this season. … the pitch favours batsmen and this season could be another hard slog. I think they will struggle.
Gloucestershire: They simply have to perform better than they did last year, be that in the one-day or four-day form of the game.
Kent: Stuart Clark may yet be a great signing …
Leicestershire: The Foxes are still nowhere near being major candidates for silverware or promotion. They are a middle of the road side and simply do not have enough money to improve vastly a squad that is too reliant on young players.
Middlesex: They will be stronger when Shah is available.
Northamptonshire: It’s hard to see any progress at Wantage Road this season. … They could struggle to improve on last season, when they won only three out of 16.
Surrey: They need to plan what they want to do and how they want to do it. … I’m not sure they can be promoted straight back.
Yes, I’m cherry-picking, and yes, this is shooting fish in a barrel, but golly is he grumpy. He’s ‘nice’ about three of the nine counties, and even there you can hear his bored, boring tones. I find him so hard to reconcile with the legend of ‘81. Maybe he’s been jealous of Botham’s fame ever since?
Austin Mitchell’s ‘aesthetic temperament’ is exposed in last month’s regular debate on Public Accounts Committee reports:
Mr. Mitchell: … the obsession with employing consultants. We employ them for every problem that comes up, and the resulting bill is enormous. Overall, it amounts to £70 billion or more, but the assumption is that the necessary expertise is no longer available in the civil service. …
The Exchequer Secretary to the Treasury: Where did my hon. Friend get his figure of £70 billion for Government spending on consultants? For the record, the amount is £900 million. That total fell by 31 per cent. between 2005 and 2008 …
Mr. Mitchell: I admit that the figure that I quoted was my own concoction, but I did not hire a consultant—I made it up myself.
Mr. Bacon: I think that the Minister was getting a bit excited at the thought that suddenly there was nearly £70 billion that the Treasury did not know about that could be used for something. We all know the hon. Gentleman’s aesthetic temperament when it comes to statistics. I have completely forgotten what I wanted to say in this intervention! It was something to do with consultants and, if I remember, I shall let him know.
Mr. Mitchell: The figure includes consultants employed by local government.
Mr. Bacon: I have remembered what I wanted to say. …
Hansard reference: HC Deb 12 March 2009 c488-93. Similar Canadian nonsense is occasionally posted at Hansurdity.
That is all.
